Your papers please? (pronounced with a german accent)

Every year the annual tax return creates world war III a little bit of tension in our house because B is frugal and wants to apply the money to credit card bills or some other nonsense. But luckily, we paid off our last credit card in July and have been celebrating ever since. This year we both agreed to take the money and go here in August. Our friends own a B&B on the island and have invited us along with them to boat, hike, moped and whale watch.

I’ve started the process to get my passport. The last time I went to Canada I took a tattered photocopy of my birth certificate and my drivers license. I was born at home with a midwife, which is another story, and never got an official copy of the birth certificate. The lady at the Delta Ticket Counter took one look at the obviously inferior document and said, “this isn’t going to work. It’s not even a certified copy.” I was devastated as I had just been dropped off at the airport which is two and a half hours from our house. I almost started crying and said, “but I’ve been dropped off. I don’t have a ride home.” The lady said, “you’re going to have to call your ride to pick you back up.” I lied and said, “but I have no way of contacting them, they don’t have a cell phone.” Her eyes narrowed and she sized me up. She sighed and said, “o.k., I’m going to go ask my supervisor, but he’s going to tell you the same thing. This paper isn’t going to work for International Travel.” So she spun on her heels and went through a door to some unknown office and I was left to wait and pray.

Dear God, I know I just lied about the cell phone and I don’t deserve to ask for anything, but if you could help Delta to act human and have some compassion for an unprepared traveler, it would be wonderful.

After about 5 minutes, the Delta lady returned and she looked mad. She said, “Well, he’s going to allow this, but when you get to Canada, they may just turn you right around and send you back!” She finished the boarding pass and handed it to me with obvious fury. On the plane, my stomach was in knots as I imagined the Canadian Mounties firing muskets at this intruder to their country. It was really an awful way to travel and I put “writing a letter to Delta” on my to-do list of 2005 (which I’m still working on).

Cry baby

Maddie and I were snuggled up under our favorite blanket on the couch the other night when I came across The Sound of Music on TV. The movie was well past half over but we started watching when Maria returns from the abbey to take care of the children. She finds out that the man she loves is engaged to be married to someone else. Maddie looked up at me and asked, “Mommy, why are you crying?” I sniffed and said, “what? I’m not.”

The movie continued and soon Maria and the Captain have expressed their love for each other and have gotten married and gone on their honeymoon. When they return , they realize the Third Reich wants the Captain to report for duty so they plan their get-a-way and are hiding in a large church as the Nazis look for them. Maddie sees me crying and says, “why are you crying again?” I wiped the tears that were blatantly sliding down my cheeks and said, “this movie just makes me cry, I don’t know why.”

Every time I watch this crazy movie I end up bawling. I cry when she makes the hideous play clothes, I cry when The Captain blows that annoying whistle, and I really cry when Rolfe becomes a Nazi. What makes you cry?

Good-bye Heath

I was stunned today to hear the news about Heath Ledger. He was found dead in his apartment with a bottle of sleeping pills next to him. He was only 28 years old. It’s an unbelievable shame that either this was a preventable accident or that he felt such hopelessness that he chose to go out this way. It seems pretty obvious that he struggled with depression as a lot of people do. I just wish he could have held on a little longer. I keep thinking about his little girl, Matilda who will grow up without a Daddy. Heath, you were an incredible actor and a free spirit. You made us laugh and cry and feel things. You will surely be missed.

Slap your momma good

A friend loaned me the Paula Deen book called It Ain’t All About the Cookin’. I’ve really enjoyed reading about Paula’s life and her struggles along the way but the best thing about the book is the southern recipes that she’s included. Saturday night I made her beef stroganoff that she brags is good enough to make you slap your momma and she’s not kidding. It’s really one of the best recipes I’ve ever tried.

Beef Stroganoff

• 1 and 1/2 pounds cubed round steak, cut into thin strips
• House seasoning (1 cup salt, 1/4 C black pepper, 1/4 C garlic powder)
• flour
• 2 T olive oil
• 2 T butter
• 1 medium onion, sliced
• 8 ounces fresh mushrooms, sliced
• One 10 and 3/4 ounce can condensed cream of mushroom soup
• One 11 ounce can beef broth
• 1 C sour cream
• salt and black pepper to taste
• Cooked wide egg noodles

Season the steak strips with House Seasoning, then dust the strips with flour. In a large skillet, quickly brown them on both sides in the olive oil and butter. Remove the steak from the pan. Add the onion  slices and mushrooms to the pan drippings. Cook for a few more minutes, until the onion is tender, then sprinkle with 1 teaspoon flour. Put the steak back into the pan with the onion and mushrooms. Add the mushroom soup and beef broth. cook over low heat for about 30 minutes, covered. Stir in the sour cream. Adjust seasoning to taste, adding salt and pepper as needed. Serve over cooked hot buttered egg noodles.

Serves 4

Mona’s 25!

I have to give a shout out to one of my favorite bloggers. If you don’t have a Saipan writer on your current blogroll than quickly add Kirida to your faves. She makes me laugh daily.

New Cloverfield Diet

We just got back from seeing the much awaited Cloverfield. I have to say that I enjoyed it over all but the shaky camera work really made me sick. The premise is that a hand-held video is being shot by some young adults in New York City on the night of a good-bye party for one of their friends. Scenes that were previously recorded are included in the film as footage that bleeds into the main video(as if the tape was recorded over). Text at the beginning identifies the footage as classified government material located at the area formerly known as Central Park.

I love a good scary movie and this one is definitely terrifying. There are a few flaws in believability as when one of the main characters is impaled on a steel rod. Her friends help lift her off of the metal and then she is able to miraculously stand and run the rest of the movie without bleeding to death.

We were supposed to go out to dinner after the movie, but everyone was too nauseous to eat. I’m not sure if it was all the blood and guts or just the shaky camera work, but Cloverfield definitely ruined my dinner.

What’s in a name?

I went to check the mail today and we received a bill from our insurance company. It showed that we owe for part of a doctor visit that happened in December and it listed my husband’s name as the patient. The only problem is that no one in our family has been to the doctor in months and it showed that the visit happened in a nursing care facility.

I called the doctor’s office and explained everything and the lady in the billing department was really friendly and efficient. She said that she would check into it and give me a call back. It was only ten to fifteen minutes later when the phone rang and it was her. She said that an older gentleman in Whispering Pines has the same exact name as my husband and his doctor visit was inadvertently billed under my husband’s account. She even offered to send an updated form to our insurance company. I have to say it was the most painless telephone conversation I’ve ever had with a medical billing department.

Maybe it was my euphoria caused by the unexpected efficiency of the lady on the phone, but I keep thinking of the little old man stuck in the nursing home. I wonder if I should visit him? He shares the same name with my husband and maybe the same lineage. Is he Irish? Does he love football? And most importantly, is he lonely?

Do you like your mother in law?

from youtube.com posted with vodpod

Have you ever lied to get a job? Have you ever cheated on your spouse? Do you really care about starving children in Africa? These are just a few of the quesions asked on the new Fox gameshow called The Moment of Truth. The show is fairly straight-forward. Contestants are strapped to a lie detector machine and asked a series of 21 questions. As long as they answer honestly, they can proceed to the next question. If they can  answer all 21, then they receive $500,000. To add to the tension, the contestants friends, family and co-workers are placed in the audience. Fox makes no apologies about the fact that the appeal of the show is watching people face uncomfortable questions in front of their loved ones.

The show is accepting applicants for casting. I feel like I’m a pretty open book but I guess we all have questions we would hate to answer in front of certain people. Is so-in-so a good Mom? Does bla-bla-bla drink too much? What question would be hardest for you to answer for a half a million dollars? Feel free to answer anonymously.

just shoot me

I can’t think of one positive thing to say. I never wanted this blog to turn into some blathering, cesspool of daily gripings but I can’t think of one happy thing to write about. Tonight American Idol starts up again. Can it really be time for that show again? I admit I have watched it since the beginning. Yes, I basically discovered Kelly Clarkson. I noticed her on one of the first episodes and rooted for her through to the end. I watched Rubin & Clay, and Fantasia and even Jordin Sparks but I’m so over that show. I only watch it because I have a 10 year old daughter who kind of likes it and it’s a show we can watch together, but like I said, I’m so over it.

I was supposed to mentor a child today. I’ve been signed up to do this since this summer and there always seems to be something holding up the program at her school. I was assured that today would be a-go. I marked out my morning at work to be able to mentor and was all set to go when I got a call this morning and was told that my mentee was given in-school suspension and the principal at the school won’t allow any student in suspension to meet with a mentor. That makes sense. Take a child that is really going through something and punish them and be sure to cut off contact with any adult that might be able to counsel them in a positive way.

I have a better idea for punishing kids. Sit them in a room and make them watch American Idol Season 7.

love this girl

from content.foxsearchlig posted with vodpod

I saw Juno this weekend and fell in love with Ellen Page. She’s a 20 year old actress from Nova Scotia. You might have seen her in X-Men: The Last Stand or Hard Candy. Watch how cute she was on Letterman as she discusses her new home in Halifax that just happens to be inside a 130 year old Whore House.